Marriage Mistakes- Top 10

We're human, we're emotional and we're in a relationship- of course challenges will arise. That being said, why do some marriages seem to thrive and others dive? There is a pattern to Martial problems and issues that people share. Below are the top ten things you need to try and avoid in your own relationship.

1. Lack of Respect- never badmouth your spouse to family, friends or co-workers. Spouses need to be thanked and appreciated.


2. Not Listening- pay attention to your spouse when they are talking


3. Lack of Sexual Intimacy- this is a death knell for a marriage. Seek counseling and medical help if necessary.


4. Always Having to Be Right- very few people can love a 'know-it-all'. Admit when you've made a mistake or that you don't have all the answers.


5. Not Walking the Talk- Actions speak louder than words, follow-thru and do something when you say you will.


6. Hurtful Teasing- don't tease your spouse unkindly or use 'put-down' words.


7. Dishonesty- Keeping lies and secrets in your relationship creates distance and lack of trust.


8. Being Annoying- Things like gross personal hygiene habits, always being late, nitpicking, ect.


9. Being Selfish or Greedy- It's not all about you. Open your home to family & friends, don't hog the remote, watch movies your spouse wants to see.


10. Having Temper Tantrums- You are no longer a child. Every couple needs to be able to handle conflict in a constructive way. Anger outbursts will make you the loser in the end.

Spouse not Listening to You?

Nothing is more frustrating than a spouse who won't listen or tunes you out. Why?
The listening problem in your marriage could be related to issues that your spouse has, your method of delivery or more commonly, a combination of both.

People want to know how to make a spouse listen. Bottom line, there's nothing you can do to get your spouse to listen if they don't want to listen. You cannot change anyone but yourself. You cannot force your mate to hear what you are saying or to understand how you are feeling if your partner doesn't want to. Forcing or manipulating someone into counseling doesn't mean that they will truly listen to what a counselor has to say either. What can you do?

Here are some tips on how to be a more effective communicator and listener;

1. Don't Interrupt
2. Keep an Open Mind
3. Make Listening a Priority
4. Use the Feed-Back Technique
5. Watch for Non-Verbal Signs
6. Stay Focused
7. Remember Gender Differences
8. Show Respect
9. Don't Give Advice unless Asked

Poor communication skills can be an inherited family trait. If a person is raised in an environment where people don't listen or can't express their feelings, they will probably bring that inability to communicate into their marriage and other relationships. However, you can change the habit of being a shallow listener.